Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
