so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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