I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
Small penises have feelings too.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Randomize
