So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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