i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Randomize
