This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
Randomize
