what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
