is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
You can't motorboat a personality
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Randomize
