i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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