garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
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