haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
is wine microwaveable?
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
