Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
