hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Randomize
