What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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