Christians are straight up FREAKS
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Randomize
