"it" just moved
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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