butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
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