I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
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can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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