Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
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