brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
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