I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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