Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
I have fence marks all over my body
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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