hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
