help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Randomize
