i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize