my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
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