Joe is yelling at the trees again.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
