im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
