If i come over, it means nothing
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
You dont lie about slip and slides
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Randomize
