My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize