Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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