Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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