ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
