are you still at the devil's house?
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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