Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
im drinking this country out of the recession.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...