So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Randomize
