life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
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