he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I'm passing your future prison.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Randomize