how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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