Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize