I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
