You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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