Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
