somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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