ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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