Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize
