His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
