and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
