But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
too bad you live with your parents still
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Randomize