Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Randomize