I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize